The One Where Chloe Turns Twenty

Dress – Cameo Rose via New Look // Boots – New Look // Sunglasses – Primark // Bag – A market in Portugal

This past week has been one of the best weeks of my life, from attending London Fashion Week on Sunday, to (finally!) passing my driving test on Wednesday, this week has been pretty great, but today has to be the highlight. Today marks my 20th birthday; the start of a whole new decade, and with a fresh start at university on Monday, it is also kick-starting a whole new part of my life.

There have been many ups and downs in the first two decades of my life, but each dark moment, and every triumphant minute, has helped shape me in to the young woman I am today. As I am now set to embark on a brand new era of my life I thought I would look back over my life so far and pinpoint twenty things in the past twenty years that I am particularly proud of. From academic achievements, to overcoming bullying, these are the things that have had the most impact on who I am, and things that will make me proud for the rest of my life.

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Pursuing my dreams

I am starting my Contour Fashion degree at De Montfort University on Monday; something which has been a dream of mine since I was only fourteen. I am so proud of myself for spending so many hours putting in all of the hard work that it took to get the grades and portfolio to get on to my degree, and I can’t wait to begin the journey to reaching my ultimate dream: being a contour fashion designer.

Overcoming bullying

My younger and early teen years were greatly affected by bullying, and the after effects of that impacted my life for many, many years. Bullying in primary school can often be glossed over, or disregarded as not being too serious or impactful on people’s lives, but I can honestly say now that going through bullying as a young person shattered my confidence and stole my personality. It took me a very long time to piece myself back together, but I am proud to say that I am finally in a place where I can look back at the comments the bullies made and see them for what they are; cruel, hurtful lies.

Following my personal style

Finding my personal style, and then choosing to follow it, was a monumental time of my life. It truly allowed my personality to shine through in my outfits, and let me feel so much happier and more confident in my own skin. I have had so many negative comments from people I know on what I choose to wear, but I am so glad that I stuck to my guns and continued dressing the way I wanted anyway. My style makes up a significant part of my personality and I am so excited to continue exploring fashion and continuing to define my style throughout my twenties.

Travelling to Rome

My trip to Rome earlier this year, you can see my post on it here, was a defining moment in my life. By flying there alone, and paying the travel costs myself for the first time in my life, I proved to myself that I could travel independently, and it made me very excited for all of the travel opportunities to come in the next stage of my life.

Fighting my mental health issues

Not giving up is probably the thing that I am most proud of. I have come very close to giving up and giving in to my bad mental health many times throughout my life; whether that meant being suicidal or completely giving into anorexia nervosa, and I am so proud of myself for finding the courage to carry on. The ability to pick myself up and keep going is one of my best traits, and I am always amazed at how strong I can be when faced with life’s most difficult situations.

Getting amazing grades

I often feel like I’m bragging when talking about my school career, but sometimes I do have to take a step back and take the time to congratulate myself, without being scared of feeling egotistical. I managed to get seven A*s, three As and a B at GCSE, which meant that I actually got the second best results in my entire school year. I have since gone on to gain ABB at AS and A Level, and achieved a Merit in an Art and Design Foundation Degree, and I am so proud of how my hard work has paid off.

Having poetry published

My talent for poetry is probably one of my favourite things about myself, and I am so proud of myself for getting some of my poems published, and also for winning a youth poetry competition at only thirteen years old. Over the next decade of my life I am aiming to publish an anthology of my poetry, and hopefully it is something that I can continue being proud of.

Starting my blog

Starting my blog completely transformed my life and everyday I am so glad that I did it. I am so proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and starting up my little corner of the internet over three years ago, and I have been so excited watching it grow and develop. Blogging has allowed me to become a much more confident version of myself, and let me meet some of the most amazing people, who have completely changed my life.

Cutting my fringe

This sounds like an absolutely ridiculous thing to be proud of, but I am actually so proud of myself for getting a fringe. As someone who is terrified by change I found it so hard to bring myself to cut my hair, but I am so glad that I did. It has completely changed my face shape, and made my confidence sky rocket; I even got complimented on it by photographers at London Fashion Week!

Being a Guide

I have been a part of the Girlguiding family since I was five, and I am so proud of myself for everything I allowed myself to do within it. From travelling to another country to becoming a young leader and helping run a pack, I am so proud of myself for all I have achieved over my time as a Guide.

Believing in myself

Despite the easiness in which I lean towards the opposite I am so proud of myself for believing in my hopes and dreams, and that strong, core belief is only really beginning to be seen and enjoyed. I am finally getting to experience the fruit of my labour, and I am proud of myself for never letting myself slow down or get off the hard road to success.

Getting over my first heartbreak

It may sound like a trivial thing but my first heartbreak honestly shattered my world. As a hopeless romantic, who had put her all into the relationship, I was completely lost for quite a long time. There was a point where I thought the impact of the negativity towards the end of the relationship and the break up would affect me forever, but I am so, so proud of myself for slowly working my way through it. I can finally say that I am over my first heartbreak, and it feels great to say.

Not caring what other people think

This is only really something I seriously took on board this past year; like most teenagers I was very self conscious, and very much aware of the pressure to impress my peers and live up to the expectations of those around me, even if that meant betraying my true self. I can’t believe that I used to let myself be altered, and my personality dimmed, by people’s negative opinions, who really had no right to be commenting on me in the first place. The best thing I discovered this year is that not everyone has to like you, in fact there are probably a lot of people who will actively dislike you, but it doesn’t matter. As long as you have people you love, and people who love you, and you’re a kind person, then the opinions of the other people in your life don’t, and shouldn’t, affect you. I am proud of myself for finally coming to terms with this, and the positive impact that this realisation has had on my personality and confidence.

Helping others

Helping others and spreading love is one of my favourite things to do, and I am proud of myself for the amount of charity work I have done in my life. I have helped out on multiple Oliver 68 holidays, where we take under-privileged children away on holiday, and volunteered on a pilgrimage to Lourdes, where I looked after elderly, sick and disabled people. I’ve also taken part in countless charity events and I am proud of how I have given back to society, and can only hope to continue to do this throughout my twenties.

Not being afraid of my religion

In a world dominated by open-minded, free-spirited people who are slowly but surely trying to abolish the very contrived society of days gone by it can sometimes feel like an embarrassment to admit that you have faith. So, each time I practise my religion as a Catholic I feel proud of myself for standing up and speaking about my beliefs. I feel that by exploring the world, and spreading beautiful snapshots of God’s creation across social media, I am playing a part in sharing the beauty of God’s creation, and that this is all part of His plan for me. I am proud to admit that I am a Eucharistic Minister and have obtained the St John Paul II Gold Award for my contribution to the life of the Church.

Finding friends I love

I am proud of myself for finding friends I love, and also being able to evaluate the situation of someone leaving my life, without immediately thinking it’s the end of the world and blaming myself. I now have a strong and amazing set of friends who I know I can trust, and I finally feel happy, confident and safe around my close friends; something that I feared I may never find.

Getting amazing blog opportunities

Amazing blog opportunities, such as being invited to the opening of the world’s largest Primark or working with Soap & Glory, were simply bucket list dreams only a short while ago. However, through my hard work and determination, I have managed to make them a reality, and I am so proud of myself for beginning to delve into the lifestyle that I’ve spent years dreaming of.

Passing my driving test

Passing my driving test may have taken a little while (and a few attempts!) but I am so proud of myself for persevering and trying again. Now that I’ve passed my test I can’t wait for all of the independence and adventure that my future will hold as I hopefully embark on many road trips.

Staying true to my beliefs on alcohol

In a world where alcohol holds a lot of importance it takes guts to say that you don’t want to drink, and then stick to that decision. I can proudly say that I’ve never drunk alcohol, and honestly never plan to do so, and I am proud of myself for not succumbing to peer pressure. I know that I am fun enough without alcohol, and I can enjoy myself without the negative after effects of drinking.

Choosing happiness

Choosing happiness over sadness, and healthiness over illness, is a decision that I have to continuously work on in my life, but I am so proud of myself for choosing to pursue happiness time and time again. Finding the tiniest grain of hope in a sea of depression can seem like an impossible task, yet I manage it each and every time, no matter how long or grueling the journey to finding it may be. I pray that over the next decade of my life I continue to choose happiness, for that is the thing I am most proud of: when the world gave me every reason to cry, I turned round with a determined smile and said, ‘I choose to be happy’.

Love Chloe x